On my
flight back home, I "coincidentally" sat next
to someone I
had not seen since high school. I had heard that he had
renounced
the faith some time ago and so I asked why he was no
longer a
believer. He immediately responded, "Why are
you a
Christian?" I gave some standard apologetics-based
answers, but
by the end of the flight I was dissatisfied and finally
said,
"There is a line in Dostoevsky's The Idiot where
the Prince
says, 'I believe the world will be saved by beauty.' I
am a believer
because Christianity is that beauty." And then we
went our
separate ways. I regret having no time to elaborate on
what I meant
by that quote, so I do so now.
Beauty is that which moves
the affections and passions in a
pleasing way. So when I say that I have an insatiable
desire to
experience beauty, that is to say, I long to be moved.
This longing
has many levels met by varying degrees of beauty. Porn
or romance
novels, for example, are some of the lowest forms of
beauty because
they move a person's animal passions. Moral beauty, on
the other
hand, is a higher form of beauty because it moves the
soul's
affections.
Thus displaying moral
beauty is what separates a great movie from
a mediocre one. The heroism in Schindler's List, the
sacrificial
love in Titanic, the grace shown to Valjean in Les
Miserables are
just a few examples of this. This holds true in real
life. Moral beauty is what separates a great experience from an
average one.
Seeing the embraces and kisses of nuns shown to full-
blown AIDS
patients in Cambodia, seeing a volunteer cradle and sing
hymns daily
to a blind toddler at an orphanage in China, seeing 300
firemen run
up a burning tower to save others are some examples of
this higher
beauty that moves the soul.
I am a Christian because I
am a lover of beauty, and nothing more moves the
soul than the gospel. When I discovered that all moral
beauty are dim
reflections of God's beauty, I became a Christian.
Consider my examples.
Schindler's efforts to
rescue the Jews were noble, but Christ's
rescue was more noble. Schindler regretted not giving up
his lapel
pin to save more Jews, but Jesus had no regrets; He gave
up all
including His own life for His beloved elect. The nuns
caring for the AIDS patients in
Cambodia were compassionate, but Christ was more
compassionate. He
not only kissed the morally diseased, He took on their
disease in solidarity to
heal them. The volunteer cradling the blind orphan was
lovely, but
Christ was more lovely. He Himself became an orphan on
the cross so
that we orphans may be adopted by His Heavenly Father.
The 300
firemen were brave, but Christ was more brave. The
firemen ran up
the towers with the possibility of coming back unhurt.
Christ knew
with certainty that He would face the pains of hell yet
He still
chose to come down. Honor, sacrifice, courage, patience,
all moral
beauty find their source and perfection in Jesus.
In this light, Dostoevsky
understood that beauty would save the world. The incomparable beauty
of
Christ will overcome the horrific evil,
including great apathy towards evil, that engulfs the
world.
The humility of Christ's
incarnation is inspiring believers to
live in
the top worst cities to provide basic services for
the impoverished. The compassion of Christ's crucifixion is
inspiring the Dietrich Bonhoeffers. The nobility of
Christ's
redemption is inspiring the William Wilberforces. The
glory of Christ's
resurrection is inspiring more dignity for the
crippled, ugly, and mentally challenged whose bodies and
minds will
soon enough reflect the worth of their souls. All moral
beauty finds its
consummation in Christ without whom the world would
remain terribly
disfigured.
What is amazing about the
gospel is that the ugliness of the
world makes up a major facet of Christ's beauty. Those
ravished by
the beauty of Christ and desire to experience more and
more of it
cannot do so without first taking into account the
suffering of
others that is to be transformed into compassion, or
facing
another's despair that is to be changed into hope. In
other words,
the soul's deepest longing to be moved by the greatest
beauty can
only be met through the suffering of others. Only in
Christ can this
truth be seen clearly enough to awaken the kind of
longing that will
help save the world.
Christ's beauty will save
the world. That is why I am a
Christian.